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She Shoulda Used a Blender

So I’m walking into the Crossroads Country Store the other day (acknowledging the friendly gentry a setting outside on Dead Pecker Bench as I opened the door) when the bold of a front page story in the local newspaper catches my eye:

COOK ADDS MANURE TO RECIPE, GETS ARRESTED

Shipsafire! What in tarnation is this all about? So I reach into the rack and fetch out that paper and commence to read on:

“ Polk County sheriff’s deputies have arrested the cook at a local rafting company on felony charges after she allegedly served food contaminated with horse manure to company employees. Whitewater Express cook Louise M. Stiles, 51, of Ducktown, was arrested Monday afternoon after one of the company’s guides complained to authorities of finding a clump of manure in some barbecue he was eating, said Polk County Sheriff’s Department Chief Deputy Lew Crawford. Crawford said Stiles had had a verbal confrontation with some of the guides previously and was apparently trying to get even. He said some of the contaminated food was consumed by the guides, but no contaminated food was served to the company’s customers. Stiles was arrested on two counts of adulterated food, which is a felony under Tennessee law, Crawford said.”

So I folded up that newspaper right neat-like and fetched back into the rack. Well, this here story just proves what I’ve kinda knowed all along:

A raft guide’ll eat anythang if’in ye put enough barbecue sauce on it.



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