(NOTICE - No squirrels were harmed during the performance of Squirrel-A-Vision 2000)

During a long, kid-intensive (one 8 year old, one 7 year old, two 6 year olds) Adirondack canoe camping trip, one of the sites where we set up camp had suffered a microburst wind shear some years before. The upside of this was that there was plenty of dead and downed wood for fires.

The downside was that this quantity of downed wood made great habitat for rodent type critters; we were overrun with squirrels, chipmunks and weird hopping mice (I had never seen jumping mice on the east coast before).

Anyway, we ended up using the local rodent population for entertainment - twice a day, during breakfast and dinner, we would all gather 'round to tune into what the kids eventually referred to as "Squirrel-A-Vision 2000" or "The All Squirrel Channel".

"Squirrel-A-Vision 2000" transpired like this. First we hung a stick, baited with a dab of peanut butter at each end and balanced horizontally at its mid-point, from an overhanging branch. The stick was hung with a length of 20 lb mono-filament line and 3 rubber bands strung together. The squirrels would leap out from the nearest branches and bounce around swinging wildly on the stick, eating peanut butter and attempting to master the trick of working their way from one end of the stick to the other while they wobbled and swayed through the air.

It was really interesting to watch the learning curve as the squirrels tested all of the possible leaping routes to reach the stick. ALL of the possible leaping routes; squirrels are apparently not content with discovering a few easy, convenient routes, they feel compelled to continue to try more difficult, if not impossible, routes. (Leaping from a branch 15 feet away, we could just imagine the squirrels thinking

"Oh hell, this isn’t going T
                             O
                           
                                W
                                  O
                                    R
                                      K
                                        !)" thud

After the squirrels had mastered stage 1, we trimmed back the nearby branches so the leap was more difficult/daring. Another learning curve. One squirrel, nicknamed "Big and Brutal" by the kids was the fastest learner. He would also beat up "Little and Cute" and "Small and Stupid" if they tried to attain the peanut butter stick while he was around.

Once stage 2 was mastered we increased the difficulty level by suspending the balanced stick/rubber band contraption from a traverse rope between 2 tall trees, so that it was hanging a long way out in mid-air. It took a true leap of faith to go for the peanut butter at this point, having to time the leap just right as the stick slowly twisted in the breeze but, after a few complete misses, "Big and Brutal" got his timing down and mastered this new routine in short order.

The final stage of the squirrel baffle found us attaching some 6lb test from a rod and reel to the baited, leap-of-faith stick. One of the kids would sit waiting for Big and Brutal to make his leap and, while B&B was soaring through the air enroute to the promised land of peanut butter noshes...yank the stick out of his reach! I've never seen quite that expression on a rodent's face before (not to anthropomorphize things, but he was surely thinking "What the F#$%!). Alternatively, the kids would let B&B leap out onto the stick and then, lashing the rod about, demonstrate "that daring young squirrel attempting to eat peanut butter while clinging desperately to a flying, spinning, soaring trapeze".

To truly appreciate "Squirrel-A-Vision 2000" you would have to observe 4 adults and 4 kids, gathered in a semi-circle at mealtimes, sitting around a peanut butter baited stick in the woods, laughing maniacally.

One final "Squirrel-A-Vision 2000" note: The over-inflated party balloons (yes, we had balloons; I was treated to a wonderful backcountry birthday party) we attached to trees with a dab of peanut butter smeared on them didn't have the anticipated effect - I was figuring on a squirrely freakout, a rodent coronary. In fact, the squirrels would bite the balloon, the balloon would explode in the squirrel’s face, and the squirrel would kind of shrug, look around to see where the peanut butter had impacted, and nonchalantly wander off to eat it.